What if I Told You There is No Such Thing as Failure?
Failure is merely a feeling
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You might have heard how success is built on failures and how important it is to learn from your mistakes, but there is more to it. Just like any issues you are facing, whether it’s a person or a task at hand, it’s not the thing itself that’s the problem, but how you are relating to it. How do you see failure? Do you fear it? We mostly do, and yet, it’s an inevitable part of life and growth.
What if we understood failure as merely a feeling, something impermanent, rather than a permanent trait we identify with? It starts with being aware of the language we use. Rather than saying ‘I’m such a failure’, but taking on a more objective voice saying ‘I tried this one thing in this way and it didn’t quite work out.’
The problem with creativity and life is, we often get drowned out by our inner critic instead of staying curious with the process and seeing what else is there. Unfortunately, sometimes we even stop trying again to avoid the pain of feeling or being seen as a failure. But don’t succumb to playing small. It will only make you feel frustrated and discontent further down the road because deep down, we all have an innate desire to express and create freely.
“Live life as though nobody is watching, and express yourself as though everyone is listening.” — Nelson Mandela
Allow things to shape and form as you go along. Stop trying to figure things out, but simply show up and try, and let it figure itself out. The more I understood and experienced a flow state in life whether it is through a walk in nature, meditation, or being captivated by beautiful architecture, I can see how the principles of mindfulness and intentional living apply greatly to creativity and work.
It’s about mastering the balance of efforting and relaxing. Just like when we tense a muscle and relax it after lifting something, the best moments and creation are done in a similar tension of push and pull, trying and seeing what happens, flowing with the process rather than trying to control it.
However, our society encourages us to stay in the efforting zone, being productive and trying to reach somewhere with quick results. The best work and life are never created that way. We need to intentionally create space for experimentation and play, a place that allows mistakes and messiness to happen freely.
“A mistake is valuable if you do four things with it: recognize it, admit it, learn from it, forget it.” — John Wooden
Isn’t it such a relief to acknowledge that mistakes are a part of life and that we will definitely fail along the way? Just because you’ve tried something and failed, it doesn’t mean that they were all for nothing. I argue to say that they are of equal importance as your accomplishments. They are guideposts pointing you to the next steps. But you must know how to discern what to keep and what you should courageously leave behind.
Of all times, it was the period of being lost, of trying to figure out where my relationship, my career and who I am all fit in the wider scale of life, the constant questioning and not valuing my worth, taking the wrong turns, that all shaped me to be authentically who I am today.
Through these challenging times, I learned to be courageous and opened up to lean into support and love, and most importantly, I learned to trust myself. This period gave me the opportunity to acquire the habit of meditation, to write consistently and even paved the way for my passion and life mission’s work — to empower people through mind-body practices.
It gave me a sense of appreciation knowing that the years of figuring out, of feeling lost, has all led to a grounding place of knowing who I am and what I’m about. And by freeing up the thought of failing as merely a feeling, it creates space for me to live life and create with the utmost freedom.
Remember, your past is making your future possible. They were not failures but subtle guiding posts. What will you do if I told you there is no such thing as failure? Will you dare to dream a little bit more?
